08. Touchy Subjects

[gunwithoutmusic]

"Wounds"
183 words. Approximate reading time: 1 minute. Audio version here.

I see you there,
Licking your wounds,
As though licking a wound
Ever made it better,

As though I don’t
Have wounds of my own
That I tend to
Only when you are asleep,

When the world is quiet
And I can focus my thoughts.

But you can still see them.
I know because you pick at my scabs
While I swathe yours in cotton
So they can heal properly.

Sometimes I think you are my penance,
And I am whipping myself
At your misguided direction,
Punishing my present for my past

When the room is dark
And I think no one can see.

And maybe that’s my problem.
I place the blame elsewhere
And focus my efforts on you
Rather than myself.

But maybe it’s your problem, too,
That your eyes are blind
(Perhaps willfully, perhaps not),
Or too inwardly focused too see

When my life is filled with light
And you come to take it away.

Whatever becomes of us,
Of you and me as individuals
Struggling to untangle ourselves
From the straps of the baggage

We cocooned each other up in,
May we emerge as ourselves, but better.
Will we emerge separately or together?
Only time will tell.

My only hope for you
Is that one day,
You take a look in the mirror
And you finally see your own face.

Comments

[adoptedwriter]

This is beautifully said! Toxic relationships are so damaging and often hard to break away from. Take care!

[gunwithoutmusic]

Thank you - the prompt this week was almost eery, how well it fit this piece that I had already been working on on my own.

[adoptedwriter]

I have noticed this "phenomena" in the timing of Gary's prompts over the years; even the way-out-there prompts I have to go look up. It's one of the things I enjoy so much about Idol in general.

[gunwithoutmusic]

It happened a lot to me in the last regular season - I'd randomly have an idea pop into my head and then a day later, Gary would post the prompt and it would just be a nice perfect fit. Sometimes I swear he's in my head!

[halfshellvenus]

As though I don’t
Have wounds of my own
That I tend to
Only when you are asleep,
This was so painful, especially because in this moment, we know how very true it is.

There is nothing like having a person we love tornado through our heart and soul, blades flying and shredding us to pieces as they fixate on their own hurt and panic and remain blind to the greater destruction left in their wake. :(

I'm so, so sorry. *hugs*

[gunwithoutmusic]

Thank you *hugs* As you know from LiveJournal, I'm feeling a little bit better about things than I was when I wrote this but this poem is still very reflective of a lot of the things I still feel. It's tough but so am I.

[eeyore_grrl]

"But you can still see them.
I know because you pick at my scabs
While I swathe yours in cotton
So they can heal properly."


I'm pretty sure I lived that relationship senior year of college. Loved her wholly, but we were not in a healthy relationship.

Well written; you get the feeling out to the reader. Not always easy to do.

[gunwithoutmusic]

It's hard to live that way - especially when you can feel what you think is love coming from the other side while also not being sure that they even really KNOW what love is.

Thank you so much for your kind words :)

[bleodswean]

This is so powerful - As though I don’t
Have wounds of my own
That I tend to


Poetry can heal. Writing it and reading it. Thank you for this. And I hope you find your way, m'dear.

[gunwithoutmusic]

Thank you so much - things have been hard but I'm figuring it out.

[swirlsofpurple]

Oh, this is so sorrowfully evocative and heart-breaking, such a powerful beginning and ending!

[gunwithoutmusic]

Thank you so much :)

[alycewilson]

Again, so sorry you're going through this, but this poem expresses what upure experimenting in a poignant way.

[gunwithoutmusic]

Thank you - one of the "issues" that comes up frequently in my marriage is that fact that I'm able to generate stuff like this based on how I'm feeling about something, but only days later and never at the time. It takes me a while for things to kind of sit and let me know how I'm feeling about something. Great for writing, not-so-great for real-time conversations!

[alycewilson]

I think that's an issue that plagues many writers (myself included).

[flipflop_diva]

Oh wow. This just makes my heart hurt for you. This is written so well but it's so heart-breaking and I hate that you're going through this.

I see you there,
Licking your wounds,
As though licking a wound
Ever made it better,

As though I don’t
Have wounds of my own
That I tend to
Only when you are asleep,

This part, especially, just hits super hard. And I wish it were just words, and not something real <3

[gunwithoutmusic]

Thanks - things are still weird between us but we're figuring it out. There are moments when everything seems like it's just completely back to normal and moments where I want to just hole up in bed and hide from the world. Things are better for me personally in general, though, so small blessings, I suppose. :)

[murielle]

Oh wow! This is so...so great, deep, relatable, touching. The words when I read them are powerful, but when you read them so much more than that.

Bravo!

[gunwithoutmusic]

Thank you :) Sometimes I feel like I'm doing the audio recordings just for you, but I'm fine with that!

[murielle]

I'm thrilled! You have a fabulous voice. Seriously, if you're ever looking for a...what's is called?...side job? Seriously, look into vocal work.

P.S. I hurt about where this poem is coming from for you, but it's so beautifully written, and spoken.